Thursday, October 18, 2012

Okay

I have an appointment with my doctor today - he is a spinal cord injury specialist at the University Hospital in SLC. He's got all my surgery records from all my past surgeries and is going to give me advice for finding the right OBGYN and any other doctors who I'll need to see for when I am pregnant.

I have such the strong feeling that I will have a boy next July (and a girl the following August). But to give him adequate time to develop, I need to get pregnant this month! I hope I do. I hope I do. I hope I do. Now because I 'want' this feeling to be 'correct,' but rather because I know he is coming in July and I want him to have all the developmental womb time he needs! I don't want him to come early...

But on that note, I suppose it will be okay if he comes early. When I got the revelation I would have a boy next July (and a girl the next August), I did the math and figured I needed to get pregnant in November. A couple weeks ago (actually, I think it was just last week), I went to the temple with my friend and she told me that she saw a "due-date" calendar and it said that if you had a baby in July you got pregnant in October. I quickly did the math again and found out she was right! I spent the rest of the temple time pleading in prayer that I would have a healthy baby - I don't know if I missed getting pregnant in October. I told God I was okay with having a baby with disabilities - blind, deaf, diseased, or whatever - I just didn't want it to be because I had messed up!

On the way out of the temple, I saw a picture of the Savior with a young boy He seemed to be "presenting." I'm not familiar with the picture but the Holy Spirit touched my heart and I felt assured that I would have a healthy son.

(this is the picture - it hangs on the wall by the elevator in the brand new, and totally beautiful and my favorite - Brigham City temple) 


...so I guess it is okay if I don't get pregnant in October.
And it's okay if he comes early.
And it's all going to be okay.

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